Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Because I Need To Laugh

A lady walks into a hardware store and asks the clerk where the hindges are. He takes her to where they are and she immediately selects the one she needs. The clerk askes her if she wants a screw for the hindge---she says, "no, but I'll blow you for the toaster on that shelf".

A man of Polish ancestry walked up to the counter and asked for a Polish Meatball Sandwich.

The man at the counter said, "What a Pollack."

The Polish man said, "I resent that. If a Jew came to your counter and asked for a kosher salami on rye, would you call him a stupid Jew."

"Probably, " replied the clerk.

"And if an Italian came in here and asked for spaghetti and meatballs, would you also insult him?"

"Probably," the clerk again replied.

"Why you're nothing but a bigot. Why do you have to insult everybody not like you?"

At this, the clerk replied, "Because this is a HARDWARE store, moron."

"Do you have any batteries?" a woman asks the hardware store clerk. "Yes, m'am." The clerk gestures with his finger. "Can you come this way?" "If I could come that way," the woman says, "I wouldn't need the batteries."

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